watermelon

have you ever asked someone..
what is it that you don't like about me?
or..
do you see any attitudes or behaviours that are offensive or dishonoring to you, others, or God?

its kinda hard for me to ask that question cause...
ppl will tell me all sorts of things...
and i'm afraid to hear the truth!
what if they say i'm bitchy?
have i offended them in any way before?
woah... makes you think!

but come to think of it...
if you ask your closest buddies that question...
they point out your weaknesses
which leads you to realization...reality check
then you can improve in certain areas

though it can be quite dangerous also
extra emotional ppl(like me) can get depressed easily
(i'm trying to overcome in that area)
but i'm quite ready to take the "hit"
i know i wont be ready til i take a step forward
it is by His grace that i am able to do what i'm doing
taking in rebukes...and learn from it

if He's not in the picture, i would be condemning myself everyday
and still make the same mistakes

when some ppl rebuke me...
really sakit hati, boss
cried myself to sleep oh.
while thinking whether what they said is true.
little did i know, He is changing my heart.
i began to see a clearer picture.
indeed what they said is true. (lol)
and He enabled me to take the rebuke with a smile
cause i know He has better plans for me.

i was created for a purpose greater than self.

i dont want to look to the left or right.
dont want to see what other ppl have that i dont.
i'm sick and tired.

i wanna wake up kicking and screaming.