There is such a time when I asked God to use me to the fullest
and when He allowed something to happen, I wish it wasn't me.
Forgive me, Lord.
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Give us clean hands
And give us pure hearts
Let us not lift our souls to another
O God let us be a generation that seeks
Who seeks Your face
O God of Jacob
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It was loud and clear.
I heard You, Lord.
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Today I had the opportunity to visit the children in Likas Hospital with Pulse.
There were 14 of us (including Danica, Tabitha, and Chloe =D) and we split into 3 groups.
Each group was given a bag filled with presents for Christmas to give out to the sick children.
Evelyn, Jane, and I were in a group.
So we started out pretty good...
Most of the conversations went like this...
"Hello...Kami dari gereja SIB.....bla bla bla...ada hadiah Krismas untuk adik...*gives present* *smiles* Merry Christmas..."
Some children were shy, some were crying, some were smiling, the rest blur blur...
Some has been staying there for days, weeks, and months waiting to be discharged.
Overall it was a great experience to me.
Seeing them makes me feel so thankful that I have such good health.
But there was a particular mother...my heart goes out to her
Somehow I could see the pain in her eyes.
The way she hold and talk to her daughter.....
It was such a sight that I won't forget.
It's either the world is against you, or you are against the world.
untitled1
so yesterday Aaron, Garry, Natalia and i painted the Powerhouse room wall.
remember the cute cartoon of some PH members?
well, it's all covered by 5 friggin' layers of white paint now.
not very balanced but its the best result we can get.
i enjoyed painting the wall actually.
but not on the ladder since i'm afraid of height -.-
the part i had fun the most is in KFC and the pet shop.
too bad they dont have cats there -.-
but enjoyed watching the weird looking fishes (even dead ones) =)
pictures can be found in the previous post btw
then i attended eklektos youth service last night with Aaron
i realised the sermons are all related to love for the last few weeks.
David joked, "maybe some ppl gila BGR"
i didnt expect anything but i've truly learned for the past weeks in Eklektos service.
from "future spouses" to "homosexuals" to "definition of love"
interesting topics, ey?
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i've decided to get baptized again.
i feel the need cause when i got baptized 2 years ago, i didnt really understand the meaning and purpose of it.
so there.
=)
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today Aunt Kitty talked about the definition of worship
and i think it was really good.
almost all the stories she told in church i have heard before
(this is the benefit of working in the same office room as her)
and she doesnt mind telling it all over again
cause those are things that touched, encouraged, and motivated her personally.
its true when i say she sings EVERYDAY without fail.
even when she's working, she'll sing. (or just going up the stairs. i can hear from my office room. HAHA)
and i find it VERY true when she said singing calms a tense situation.
believe it or not, i'm so encouraged that i sing whenever i feel like it now. =)
(even though out of tune)
another person who impacted me.........................is Justin Chen
actually, not just him, but also Daniel, David Gan, and Jude.
they.......... have impacted me alot....in worship
whenever i see them worship...just singing songs to God
it encourages me so much cause i see the passion
i can hear it, i can feel it.
even though some times they sing off-tuned or too loud as if they're shouting
they make me wanna sing louder and really mean what i sing
they make me wanna lift my hands higher to reach the heavens
and i may not be very good in singing
but being around them, i dont care anymore if ppl will look at me
it's the heart that matters.
=)
i must say, i love the music they listen to.
when Aunt Kitty mentioned the story of David and Saul
Aaron said, "i wish i can play [instruments] like that."
like how?
having the power to make the devil leave whenever i play [musical instruments]
how about you?
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another thing that inspired me is this...............
If I don't feel suffering, I shall not long for happiness.
If I don't feel pressure, I shall not long for liberty.
If I don't feel upset, I shall not long for joy.
If I don't feel mad, I shall not long for calmness.
If I don't feel a bit of insanity, I shall not long for consciousness.
If I don't feel disappointed, I shall not know that life is full of imperfections.
If I don't feel hatred, I shall not long for peace.
If I am not sick, I shall not long for good health.
If I am not in pain, I shall not long for love.
If I am not in grief, I shall not understand the feeling of being comforted.
If I don't feel hungry and thirsty, I shall not long for fullness.
If I am not broken, I shall not long of being fixed.
If I don't have problem, I shall not be sharpened the way I am today.
If I don't have giants in my life, I shall not long for strength.
written by Joy Bangun, my friend from college.
love it. =)
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i dunno why.
i always feel sentimental on Sundays.
especially Sundays.
whatever.
had a slight misunderstanding with a friend.
guessed she was a bit over reacting but little did she know it hurt me as well.
move on, danielle.
then i met Uncle Ronnie and Aunt Diane in City Mall.
actually i've missed them =)
so yeah, i was glad.
thanks row row for the gift. appreciate it.
and.....uh... i think i need to talk to someone.
ugh...this shall be my last
Rules & Regulations :
#01; - Each player of this game starts off with 10 weird things/habits/little known facts about yourself.
#02; - People who get tagged need to write a blog of their own 10 weird things/habits/little known facts as well as state this rule clearly.
#03; - At the end, you need to choose 10 people to be tagged and list their names.
#04; - No tag back!
1. I love tom yam
2. I love laksa
3. I love kittens! so cute....................i wan............................
4. I would like to have a totoro soft toy................pls?
5. I read random blogs
6. I like to sing
7. jellypuddingjellypuddingjellypuddingjellypudding
8. I like to see huge fat weird looking fishes.
9. I always wanted to learn drums
10. I wonder when bobby will answer this tag
I tag.
1. BOBBY ANDY MAJIMBUN
2. NMS
3. GAS
4. andrea...(for not being able to come to help with the painting. HAHA)
5. aaron heng (its a must to tag him. i dunno why.)
forget the rest.
happy birthday pauline~
so yeah, yesterday was my birthday
it wasnt a GREAT SURPRISE birthday
it was quite sad and disappointing, really
sigh
i bet venetia forgotten about it =(
some ppl even asked if it was my bday -.-"
zha dao
no one ask me out somemore
argh
now, time to move on...
this is a new season.
i'm finally 2 years old now. Hallelujah. (yes, 2!)
i must say i'm not very mature......yet...in many areas
so many things i have yet to learn
but God has been really faithful to me
i'm beyond blessed...
Father I pray that you continue to mould me, use me, and fill me
everyday until Your purpose and will in my life is fulfilled.
Call me and guide me, Lord, as i walk through this journey with You
and as I seek You, trust and hope in You, You would slowly reveal yourself to me.
May You grant me wisdom each day so that I make the right decisions in life.
Thank You for all the blessings and every little things you have put in my life
In the chaos, in confusion
I know You’re Sovereign still
In the moment of my weakness
You give me grace to do Your will
In Jesus' name. Amen.
SHINee Love Like Oxygen MV
i first watched this video on channel v some time ago...and i totally love the dance and the song! damn its SOOO good...
refilled
i've never felt like this since...i dunno
i want to sing til i'm lost in Your love
i wish i could stay like that forever
even though only a few attended prayer meeting just now
but i enjoyed it very much
there was a sweet presence
thank you, Lord
weee =)
you know what?
i'm having a 15 mins fever
i guess only aaron knows what i mean
maybe bobby and susan too...
and my mom...
gosh.
i feel like a failure.
but i am NOT a failure.
Proverbs 23:7
For as he thinks in his heart, so is he.
funny
eklektos was fun
rubik's cube was fun...
walking in high heels NOT fun...
pimples NOT fun...
short hair not very fun...
drama prac was fun
waiting...not fun...at all...
depression.....
not fun.
bananas can cure depression? funny.
p/s: bananas can help lose weight too. (?)
You are faithful!
so happy oh!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
so so so so so thankful.....
and HAPPY!!!!!!!!!!!!
YAY!!! weeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee
hahahahahaha
hohohohohoh
hehehehehe
uhhuhuhuhuuh
hihihiiihihihihih
=P
ok i'm off
oh ya... HAPPY BIRTHDAY ELSA!! (7th)
its yvonne mak and innocentclair's birthday today (8th)
blessed birthdays~
not like they read my blog anyway..hehehe
bye
get me the yellow shoes
i'm facing these 4 walls again... and 2 computers
but it still feels like a psycho ward to me
please bring me go shopping
i'll love you =)
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for a moment i felt so disgusted
i mean, yeah...God hates sin but not the sinner
its the sin.
temptations are everywhere BUT
WE have to stand on our ground, man.
didnt we already have a firm foundation?
i'm sick and tired of saying i'm sorry and still do the same mistake
then what?
repent. repeat. again.
yeah, its like a dog return to its vomit
what if one day God doesnt want to accept any more apologies?
what if one day its just too late to say i'm sorry?
and do you kill someone and say i'm sorry and do the same thing to other?
gossip, backstab, betray, lie and then apologize? so easy ah?
yes, God is Love.
but have we taken too much advantage of His Love and forgiveness?
i have.
unbelievable
few years ago i was shocked when i heard the news of a relative passed away.
few years later again i was shocked when i heard the news of a friend being murdered.
i didnt dare to go to the funeral.
though we werent very close friends but it affected me a lot.
it was too late to regret.
my mind was all about "i should've done this" "i should've done that"
but nothing can change the fact.
took me a while to accept it
then there was this 'drama'.
i cant believe i've been living with it for 5 friggin' years.
but they were 5 AWESOME years alright
cause i wouldnt be who i am today if those 5 yrs didnt happen. scary.
then i realised some things that i find it the hardest to believe.
like God's forgiveness and His love for me.
i'll never understand.
few nights back, i was thinking and ,....in the end i was thanking God for everything that i have NOW.
i have a bed, my own room, clothes, internet, food...etc
i realised that i am far beyond blessed!
i mean... i actually have MORE than what i need.
uh...
and uh... after hearing the sermon by Ps Jerry about realise, repent, and return
i guess i really needed that
but i've always taken God's forgiveness for granted
and it makes me feel like the stinkiest crap ever.
but i thank God cause He didnt give up on me
even when it seem impossible but He made it possible
its....indescribable
i just wanna tell you, God, You deserve my best. =)
it's time to selah.
